Monday

FUN WITH (HOME) ADVERTISING

It's time for another installment of Fun With Advertising. A while ago I did a little post on the absurdity of fashion ads, which often feature poses or surroundings unnatural - or just plain bizarre. But it must be different with home and interior ads. They're so straightforward:  furniture. Blinds. Vases. What could possibly go wrong?

So, so much.
"Bob! BOB!!! Get the broom! Another one of those feral cat women got into the house again! I swear, I wish we'd never bought those %*#&!@ nature-friendly shades! Shoo you, SHOO!"

This is apparently a scene from a horror movie, after the crazy psycho breaks into the house, interrupting a leisurely game of living room croquet and causing the guests to all fling their mallets into a fire-wood-like pile in the middle of the floor and flee.

Because the first thing you should do after purchasing a sofa that costs as much as some third world country's GDP is to put its vulnerable buttery leather goodness in the middle of a reno project. Without windows. "Look out for the rainstorm!!!... oh, never mind." Also, the name of this couch product is "Toot." The ad print proudly proclaims: "you will always feel at home with Toot." Which made me laugh until I cried.

We'll overlook the fact that KraftMaid believes people who are genetically related must have identical hair color, and just skip on over to the subject of countertops. One of the weirdest ad trends is people lounging on their counters as if they were cushy Sertas, apparently because standing near them or cutting stuff up on them would seem so... normal. And I can't help but notice that some of these so-called counters are ridiculously low. The ad print says "imagine all the moments you'll spend in a kitchen so personal it could only belong to you." I'll take their word for it. Apparently red-heads can whip up some mean omelets with their knees.

If by "beautiful" you mean "ugly brown explosion" then yes, it happened all over that room. 

This Armstrong floor can handle anything. Even a collie that fishes. Lassie Like.

 Again with the counter-lounging. When plumbing goes wrong, it blows your countertops off. Apparently. So the real message here is, "Hire A Good Plumber." You're welcome, Roto-Rooter.
All images, companies as attributed. Published in House Beautiful May 2010, Traditional Home March 2010, Elle Decor April 2010. Collie floor ad via Armstrong Floors.

21 comments:

Marija said...

I have to admit I'm so tired but I started laughing so hard at the red head family lounging on their countertops that I almost woke up my children. My husband came over and though he is rarely entertained by the same things I am on design blogs (or in general!) he laughed just as hard. Love it. I hope you use this feature to show off your witty writing more often! Hope you had a great week/weekend!

Marija

Beach House Living said...

I like the window ad, but it's your commentary that's making me laugh.

Gypsy Purple said...

REALLY enjoyed the post!!!

Capella said...

Well done!

Adrienne said...

Haha! Thanks for making my morning. :)

Mer said...

Picture 2: That's one heck of a set of pick-up sticks.

studioJudith said...

Monday morning and you actually
made me laugh .. . . quite the
accomplishment, madame!

(and you're SO right about those
helicopters wrecking havoc with the
beach towels .. . )

Jjj

studioJudith said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Sarah Klassen said...

Great post! I admit, I'm always drawn to Roche Bobois and their ads :)

Barefoot in the Park said...

you just made me laugh so hard i cried.

FrenchBlue said...

Oh gosh! You took me right back to the 60's and being a little kid! LOVE it all!! Thanks for the flashback:)
xo

Averill said...

Hilarious. Particularly love the model crouching in the window sill.

Whatever happened to just featuring gorgeous rooms? Is that not a big enough sell these days?

Down and Out Chic said...

oh my goodness, hilarious. yes, a brown poop storm is what that hideous room looks like and the family is just kind of creepy.

erica@ moth design+luxe life said...

this made me laugh so so hard! :D xo

Sarah Youngblood said...

What fun! I crouch in the window all the time. How about you?
Looking forward to seeing you at the IWCE next week.
Sarah

Tammy@InStitches said...

I saw you were going to be at IWCE and came by to tell you how sad I am to be missing it but then you go and make me laugh !

white collar | green soul said...

Oh my gosh - thank you for a hilarious start to my Tuesday. The ads are hilarious - your commentary is even better.

Qing Cai said...

beats by dr dre
michael kors factory outlet
fitflops sale clearance
cheap nfl jerseys
longchamp handbags
toms shoes
ralph lauren shirts
rolex watches,rolex watches,swiss watches,watches for men,watches for women,omega watches,replica watches,rolex watches for sale,rolex replica,rolex watch,cartier watches,rolex submariner,fake rolex,rolex replica watches,replica rolex
thomas sabo uk
longchamp solde
nfl jerseys
burberry outlet online
tiffany jewellery
michael kors outlet store
kate spade handbags
longchamp pliage
beats headphones
mulberry handbags
tory burch outlet
ferragamo shoes sale
michael kors handbags
cheap jordans
tiffany and co
ralph lauren outlet
soccer jerseys
tory burch outlet online
beats headphones
jordan shoes
oakley sunglasses
michael kors outlet
cai20160511

Chenzhen 20160303chenzhen said...

coach factory outlet
pandora jewelry outlet
adidas supercolor pink
cheap nike air max
sac longchamp pliage
kate spade outlet
michael kors handbags outlet
adidas nmd uk
asics gel kayano
asics running shoes
ray ban sunglass,ray ban sunglasses,ray ban outlet,cheap ray bans,cheap ray ban sunglasses,cheap ray bans,ray bans
adidas superstar white
abercrombie outlet
nike tn pas cher
new balance shoes
nike force 1
converse outlet
jimmy choo
coach outlet online
rolex daytona
oakley sunglasses outlet
louis vuitton handbags
armani outlet
kobe bryant shoes
supra store
birkenstocks
nike cortez white
adidas pure boost black
dior sunglasses 2016
ralph lauren outlet
oakley sunglasses,oakley sunglass,cheap oakley sunglasses,oakley sunglasses cheap,oakley sunglasses outlet,oakley store,oakley outlet,oakley outlet store,oakley sunglasses sale,oakley sunglasses discount
coach factory outlet
fitflops sale clearance
true religion jeans
designer handbags wholesale
valentino bags
chenzhen201663

John said...

uggs on sale
nike air max 90
oakley sunglasses wholesale
burberry bags
lebron james shoes 2016
ray ban sunglasses outlet
abercrombie kids
coach outlet
michael kors handbags
air jordans
fitflop uk
ugg australia outlet
louis vuitton handbags
cheap nfl jerseys
ralph lauren outlet
michael kors purses
burberry outlet
canada goose outlet
true religion jeans outlet
louis vuitton purse
uggs on sale
coach outlet online
pandora jewelry outlet
reebok shoes
toms outlet
michael kors outlet
adidas nmd
pandora charms outlet
adidas nmd
under armour shoes
nike free 5.0
pandora charms uk
birkenstock outlet
armani jeans
new balance outlet
201686yuanyuan

adidas nmd said...

giants jersey
coach outlet online
ecco shoes outlet
jets jersey
cheap ray bans
hugo boss sale
replica watches
nike roshe run
carolina panthers jersey
nike blazer

Disclosure

Shop Hop, Great Steals, and some posts may include paid links. View our disclosure policy here.

LinkWithin

Related Posts with Thumbnails